First dates can be nerve-wracking, but fear not! With the help of social media, we can now do some background research on our potential partners beforehand.
However, even with this knowledge, the key to a successful first date lies in genuine connection and authenticity. In this article, I’ll help guide you through your first date questions and answer some tough concerns you might be having!
Where to go on a first date
Choosing the right location for a first date is important as it sets the tone for the interaction and can greatly impact how comfortable both individuals feel.
Here are some ideas for first date locations:
- Coffee Shop: A coffee shop is a classic and casual option. It provides a relaxed environment for conversation and getting to know each other.
- Casual Restaurant: Opt for a casual restaurant with a comfortable ambiance. It allows you to enjoy a meal together and continue the conversation in a laid-back setting.
- Park or Botanical Garden: A stroll through a park or botanical garden can be a pleasant and low-pressure way to connect. You can enjoy the outdoors and have the opportunity for relaxed conversation.
- Art Gallery or Museum: If you both appreciate art or culture, visiting an art gallery or museum can be an engaging and interesting first date idea.
- Mini Golf or Bowling: Activities like mini-golf or bowling provide a fun and interactive setting that can help break the ice and create a playful atmosphere.
- Outdoor Adventure: Depending on your shared interests, consider going on a hike, bike ride, or any other outdoor adventure that allows you to bond over a shared activity.
- Comedy Club: If you both enjoy humor, a comedy club can be a great way to have fun and share some laughs together.
- Live Performance: Attending a live concert, theater show, or comedy performance can be a memorable and entertaining experience for a first date.
- Food Truck Festival: If there’s a food truck festival or local food event happening, it can be a unique and enjoyable date idea, allowing you to try various cuisines together.
- Cooking Class: Taking a cooking class together can be a fun and interactive way to bond while learning something new.
Remember to consider your date’s interests and preferences when choosing the location. It’s essential to select a place where both of you feel comfortable and can easily engage in conversation.
Also, keep in mind any potential allergies or dietary preferences when planning a food-related date.
Overall, the best first date location is one that allows for meaningful conversation, connection, and shared experiences.
What to wear on a first date
Choosing the right outfit for a first date can help you feel confident and make a positive impression.
The key is to strike a balance between looking attractive and comfortable while considering the location and type of date you’ll be going on.
Here are some general tips for first date outfit ideas:
- Dress for the Occasion: Consider where the date will take place and dress accordingly. If it’s a casual outing like coffee or a walk in the park, opt for a stylish but relaxed look. For a fancier dinner or event, dress up a bit more.
- Be Yourself: Wear clothes that reflect your personal style and make you feel comfortable. It’s essential to be authentic and not try to be someone you’re not.
- Choose Flattering Outfits: Select clothes that complement your body shape and make you feel good about yourself. Confidence is attractive!
- Avoid Overdoing It: While you want to look your best, avoid going overboard with accessories or flashy clothing. Keep it simple and elegant.
- Dress for the Season: Consider the weather and dress appropriately. Layering can be a good option for unpredictable weather.
- Comfort is Key: Ensure your outfit is comfortable to wear, especially if you’ll be spending a lot of time together.
- Grooming Matters: Pay attention to personal grooming, including clean nails, neat hair, and well-groomed facial hair if applicable.
- Colors and Patterns: Opt for colors and patterns that suit your complexion and style. Neutral colors are generally safe, but don’t be afraid to add a pop of color if it suits you.
- Footwear: Choose shoes that are comfortable for the occasion. Make sure they are clean and in good condition.
Examples of outfit ideas based on different date settings:
- Casual Daytime Date: A nice pair of jeans or chinos, a casual button-up shirt, and clean sneakers or loafers.
- Dinner Date: A well-fitted dress or a nice blouse with a skirt or tailored pants. Add a stylish pair of heels or dressy flats.
- Outdoor Activity: Depending on the activity, wear comfortable and weather-appropriate clothing, such as athletic wear, a sundress, or shorts and a t-shirt.
- Formal Evening Date: Opt for a classy cocktail dress or a well-tailored suit with dress shoes.
- Beach Date: A breezy sundress or a comfortable pair of shorts with a stylish top.
Remember, the most important thing is to feel good and be yourself. Dressing appropriately and confidently will help set the tone for a fantastic first date!
What to talk about on a first date
On a first date, engaging in meaningful and interesting conversation is essential to building a connection and getting to know each other better.
Here are some conversation topics to consider:
- Hobbies and Interests: Discuss your hobbies and passions. Share what you enjoy doing in your free time, and ask your date about their favorite activities as well.
- Travel: Talk about your travel experiences and any dream destinations you’d love to visit. Travel stories can be exciting and a great way to learn about each other’s sense of adventure.
- Work and Career: Discuss your professions and career aspirations. Ask about your date’s job and what they enjoy most about it.
- Family and Background: Sharing a bit about your family and background can help you understand each other’s upbringing and values.
- Food and Dining: If you’re at a restaurant or coffee shop, discuss your favorite types of cuisine or any unique dining experiences you’ve had.
- Goals and Aspirations: Talk about your short-term and long-term goals. Share what you hope to achieve in life and learn about your date’s ambitions.
- Movies, TV Shows, and Books: Discuss your favorite movies, TV shows, or books. It can lead to interesting discussions and shared interests.
- Current Events: Lightly touch on current events or recent news that is not too controversial. Be mindful of sensitive topics.
- Fun and Interesting Questions: Ask lighthearted and fun questions like, “If you could travel back in time, which era would you visit?” or “If you had a superpower, what would it be?”
- Dreams and Bucket List: Share your dreams and aspirations, including items on your bucket list. Encourage your date to do the same.
- Pets: If either of you has pets, talk about them. People usually love discussing their furry friends.
- Childhood Memories: Share funny or memorable stories from your childhood. It can be a delightful way to bond and reminisce.
Remember to be a good listener as well. Show genuine interest in what your date is saying, ask follow-up questions, and engage actively in the conversation.
Avoid discussing overly personal or sensitive topics, and keep the tone positive and upbeat. Be open and honest but also respectful of your date’s boundaries.
Good communication is the key to a successful first date and can set the foundation for a strong connection moving forward.
How long should a first date last
The duration of a first date can vary depending on various factors, including the activities planned, the connection between the individuals, and their comfort levels.
However, a good rule of thumb is to aim for a first date to last around 1.5 to 2.5 hours.
Here are some considerations to help you decide on the appropriate duration:
- Get-to-Know-You Time: A first date should provide ample time for getting to know each other. Spending at least an hour allows for meaningful conversation and sharing of interests and experiences.
- Avoid Rushing: It’s essential not to rush through the date, as it may create a sense of pressure or anxiety. Give yourselves enough time to relax and enjoy each other’s company.
- Avoid Overstaying: While spending time together is crucial, overly long first dates can become tiring, especially if you don’t have a strong connection. Ending the date at an appropriate time avoids awkwardness and leaves room for anticipation of a potential second date.
- Be Flexible: Be open to adjusting the duration based on how the date is progressing. If you both feel a strong connection and are enjoying each other’s company, extending the date may feel natural. On the other hand, if things aren’t going as expected, it’s okay to end the date a bit earlier.
- Consider the Venue and Activity: The activities planned for the date can influence its duration. For example, a simple coffee date may last around an hour, while a dinner and a movie outing may extend to a couple of hours.
- Gauge Interest and Comfort: Pay attention to your date’s body language and verbal cues to understand if they are enjoying the date and feel comfortable. If they seem engaged and happy, it might be a good sign to extend the date if you’re both up for it.
Remember, the primary goal of a first date is to get to know each other and assess whether there is potential for a deeper connection.
Focus on the quality of the time spent together rather than the quantity. Ultimately, the ideal duration is the one that feels natural and enjoyable for both you and your date.
When to text after first date
The timing of when to text after a first date can be a bit tricky, as you want to strike the right balance between showing interest and giving the other person some space.
Here are some guidelines to consider:
- Same Evening: If the date went exceptionally well, and you both seemed to have a great time, it’s generally acceptable to send a text on the same evening after the date. A simple message like, “I had a fantastic time tonight. Thank you!” can be a nice way to express your appreciation.
- Next Day: If you prefer not to text immediately after the date, it’s common to send a follow-up text the next day. This gives both of you a chance to process the date and avoids any potential pressure to reply right away.
- Within 24-48 Hours: If you want to give a little space but still show interest, texting within 24-48 hours after the date is a reasonable timeframe. It shows that you’re thinking about them without being too pushy.
- Consider the Weekday: If your first date was on a weekday, it might be best to wait until the next day to text. On the other hand, if the date was on a Friday or weekend, texting on the same day or the next morning is more acceptable.
- Use Your Instincts: Pay attention to the flow of the date and the chemistry between you. If you both had a great connection and seemed eager to see each other again, a sooner text might be appropriate. If you sensed a need for a bit more time, wait a little longer.
- No Set Rules: Remember that there are no set rules for when to text after a first date. Every person and situation is different, so trust your instincts and do what feels right for you.
When sending the text, keep it simple, genuine, and respectful. Express your gratitude for the date and let them know you had a good time.
If you’re interested in seeing them again, you can also hint at the possibility of a second date without being too forward.
For example, you could say, “I had a great time last night. It would be fun to do something like that again.”
Ultimately, the key is to be authentic and considerate of the other person’s feelings and pace.
If you both had a positive experience, texting after the first date can be a positive step in building a potential connection.
What to text after first date
Texting after a first date is an opportunity to express appreciation, show interest, and potentially set the stage for future interactions.
Here are some suggestions on what to text after a first date:
- Express Gratitude: Start by thanking your date for the lovely time you had together. A simple “Thank you for a great evening!” or “I had a wonderful time with you tonight!” shows appreciation.
- Reference a Moment: Mention something specific that you enjoyed during the date. It could be a fun activity, a shared interest, or a memorable conversation. This shows that you were genuinely engaged during the date.
- Compliment: If you genuinely enjoyed your date’s company, offer a sincere compliment. For example, “You looked amazing tonight” or “I loved your sense of humor!”
- Show Interest: Indicate that you’d like to see them again if you’re interested. You can say, “I’d love to do this again sometime if you’re up for it” or “I hope we can do something like this again soon.”
- Be Playful: Adding a touch of humor or playfulness can make the text light and enjoyable. For instance, “I hope you didn’t get tired of my terrible jokes!”
- Plan Ahead: If you both had a good time, you can suggest another date idea. For example, “I heard about this great art exhibition next week. Would you be interested in checking it out together?”
- Ask About Their Thoughts: You can also inquire about their feelings regarding the date with a simple question like, “How did you find the evening?” or “Did you have fun?”
- Be Yourself: Be authentic and true to your personality in your text. Don’t feel pressured to follow any specific formula; your genuine feelings matter most.
- Avoid Overthinking: Keep your text light and straightforward. Avoid overanalyzing every word, as being too intense or overwhelming can be off-putting.
Remember that every person and situation is unique, so there is no one-size-fits-all approach. Gauge your date’s responses and feelings through their texts and adjust your communication accordingly.
The goal is to continue building a connection and seeing if there is potential for a second date. Keep the conversation open, respectful, and enjoyable, and see where it leads!
Should you kiss on the first date
Whether or not to kiss on the first date is a personal decision that depends on the individuals involved and their level of comfort with each other.
There is no hard and fast rule about whether kissing on the first date is appropriate or not.
Some people may feel a strong connection and chemistry and be comfortable with a kiss, while others may prefer to take things slower and get to know each other better before engaging in any physical affection.
Here are some considerations to keep in mind:
- Consent and Mutual Feelings: It’s essential to gauge whether both you and your date are on the same page and comfortable with the idea of a kiss. Consent is vital, and both parties should be enthusiastic about the idea.
- Read the Situation: Pay attention to the dynamics of the date and the body language of your date. If the conversation is flowing well, and there is a sense of mutual attraction and comfort, a kiss may feel more natural.
- Respect Boundaries: Some people prefer to take things slowly and may not be ready for a kiss on the first date. It’s essential to respect their boundaries and not push them into anything they are not comfortable with.
- Cultural and Personal Values: Different cultures and personal values may influence people’s views on physical affection on a first date. Be mindful of these differences and be respectful of your date’s perspective.
- Chemistry vs. Connection: While physical chemistry is essential, a strong emotional connection can also contribute to a meaningful first date. Take the time to get to know each other beyond just physical attraction.
Ultimately, there is no right or wrong answer to whether you should kiss on the first date.
Some successful relationships start with a first-date kiss, while others develop gradually without any physical affection on the initial meeting.
Should I have sex on the first date
Some people might be asking themselves if they should go even farther on the first date and wonder if they should have sex on the first date.
Deciding whether to have sex on the first date is a deeply personal choice that depends on your comfort level, values, and what you are looking for in a relationship.
There is no one-size-fits-all answer to this question, and it’s essential to consider several factors before making a decision:
- Personal Comfort: Assess your own feelings and comfort level with the idea of having sex on the first date. Ensure that you are making this decision based on your desires and not feeling pressured or influenced by others.
- Communication: If you are considering having sex on the first date, open and honest communication with your date is crucial. Make sure both of you are on the same page and comfortable with the idea.
- Safety and Protection: Practicing safe sex is essential to protect yourself and your partner from sexually transmitted infections and unplanned pregnancies. Always use protection and have a conversation about sexual health before engaging in any sexual activity.
- Potential Consequences: Understand that having sex on the first date can potentially impact the dynamic of the relationship. It might accelerate the intimacy, or it could make things more complicated emotionally.
- Emotional Connection: Consider whether having sex early in the relationship aligns with your desire for emotional intimacy and connection.
- Long-Term Goals: If you are looking for a serious and committed relationship, consider whether having sex on the first date aligns with your long-term goals.
- Respect and Boundaries: Respect your own boundaries and those of your date. Make sure you both feel comfortable with the decision and are not doing anything out of pressure or obligation.
Remember that there is no right or wrong answer when it comes to the timing of sexual intimacy.
Each person and relationship is unique, and what matters most is that you feel empowered and respected in your decisions.
If you are unsure or have any doubts, it’s perfectly fine to take things slow and get to know your date better before considering a more intimate relationship.
Trust your instincts and prioritize your emotional well-being above all else. Ultimately, the right decision is the one that feels right for you and aligns with your values and desires.
7 Tips To Having A Successful First Date
As someone with a degree in Psychology, I’ve used these tips in various situations, and they work like a charm.
So, let me share some psychological tricks that will surely make your first date a memorable success!
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Be True to Yourself
Honesty is the foundation of any meaningful relationship. Embrace your authentic self and avoid pretending to be someone you’re not.
Being genuine not only builds trust but also sets the stage for a more fulfilling connection.
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Show Genuine Interest
One of the most effective ways to connect with your date is by showing interest in them.
Engage in meaningful conversation and ask questions that demonstrate your curiosity about their life, passions, and experiences.
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Master Nonverbal Communication
Eye contact and a warm smile speak volumes. Instead of worrying about awkward eye contact, focus on remembering your date’s eye color.
This simple trick will make you appear more engaged and attentive.
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Mirror Body Language
Have you noticed how people tend to mirror each other’s body language when they’re comfortable with one another?
Make use of this subconscious connection by subtly mirroring your date’s gestures. It will create a sense of comfort and trust.
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Remember Their Name
Remembering someone’s name is a sign of respect and attentiveness. Try using their name a few times during your conversation.
It not only helps you remember it but also leaves a positive impression on your date.
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Compliment Sincerely
Giving genuine compliments shows confidence and appreciation.
Express your admiration for something they’ve achieved or their interesting perspectives. Authentic compliments are powerful tools for building a stronger connection.
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Observe Language Patterns
During your conversation, pay attention to the words or phrases your date frequently uses.
Nodding or smiling when they say these words will subtly encourage them to share more, and you’ll see how comfortable they are around you.
First dates don’t have to be daunting. By following these psychological tips, you can foster a genuine and meaningful connection with your date. Be true to yourself, show sincere interest, and let nonverbal cues do the talking.
Remember, building a connection is a two-way street, so observe your date’s behavior and responses.
With these insights, you’re ready to make your next first date a resounding success!
Until next time,
Cheers Lovelies!

Hey You says
A friend took the lady is out to dinner so we can meet. I totally forgot to get her phone number of all things. He offered to give me her phone number, I said I’d rather give her mine and have her call me because I thought she might feel like I was stalking her by doing it the other way. He says after the dinner they got in the car and she called a friend and said I met this guy I really liked, I felt like she got out of there as fast as she could. My biggest problem is although I’m athletic, I am 73 oh, I believe she was 63 or 65. Very pretty Italian lady. My question is should I get her number and call her?
Jenna Haith says
Hi there!
Thanks for the comment. It seems like you went on a date recently with a woman and you enjoyed her company – so much so that you would like to see her again! If this is the case, and she has not yet reached out to you, then yes, I would recommend you try getting in contact with her. You must have some sort of communication with her because you set up the date. However that happened – over a dating app, email, blind date, etc. Just a friendly reminder – Age is just a number! 🙂
Good luck and I hope you can get in touch with her!
Best,
Jenna
Jonathan says
I definitely think these are good suggestions, as long as they’re done without being too obvious. I wouldn’t call them “psychological tricks” however they are really just ways that relatively normal people should try to interact.
Jenna says
Hi Jonathan,
Thank you for the comment! I completely agree – These tricks are to help those first date jitters that some people might have and one should use these with caution not to be too obvious. However, you could argue that they are “psychological” since the majority of these tricks have to do with mind manipulation.
In fact, these specific tricks are shown to manipulate one’s thoughts, feelings, and behaviors in a specific situation – thus deeming them “psychological”.
Don’t get me wrong though, I completely agree with you that the ~average joe~ should be able to use these easy tricks without much thought and everyone should try to add these into their daily interactions. I’m sure these will help a lot of people out, especially those with anxiety!
Again, Thank you for your comment and I hope others will see this and become more informed as well!
Best,
Jenna
Adina says
I liked this. Whether any of it is true or not,… I’ll soon find out! YES! I have a first date lined up just for this. 😉
Hopefully, love will be on the air.
Jenna says
Hey Adina!
Ooooh, that is great news!! These tricks should help you in your first date jitters. Lucky you to have stumbled upon this article before your first date! 🙂 Please let us know how it went and if the tricks worked for you and which tricks you used. I would absolutely love to know!
Good luck!!
Best,
Jenna